Category Archives: The Rage Factory

You know how sometimes, you stumble across something, and it just feels right? This is a remix of something done with permission. The Rage Factory here on W.F.O. Coming at you straight from FMR Wrestling and our part time contributor “The One Man Riot Act” Michael Benningfield. This is what happens when a man cannot contain himself.

Bigger, Better, Or Maybe Just……Different

Bigger, Better, Or Maybe Just……Different

 

I never thought the day would arrive when I would find myself at a crossroads; a crossroads that forces me to make a decision about the modern day American Theatre that I love. Yes, ironically, I am talking about wrestling.

I want to preface this by saying this: I hold no qualms or bad will, ill intentions, etc. towards wrestling, or more specifically, WWE. Usually when someone says something such as “I’m no longer watching wrestling anymore” they say it in anger; spur of the moment hatred, etc.  That isn’t me. I don’t hate wrestling, I don’t hate WWE, and hell, I honestly don’t have much to complain about in the modern day product.

That being said, there comes a day in every person’s life when things get prioritized. For those that know me, and have known me for years, they know these things to be true of me in my rankings of importance:

1.) Faith

2.) Family

3.) Music

4.) Writing / Poetry / Arts

5.) Wrestling

That’s right; wrestling is fifth on that list. I have put wrestling ahead of relationships, business deals, and at times the complete future of my life. So as I write this I want you all to understand that wrestling, in all its glory, futility, etc. hasn’t changed; the Old Buzzard, however, has.

I canceled my WWE Network about a week ago and I knew this day was coming after attending WrestleMania 32. The nostalgia wasn’t there for me. The excitement, fun, wonderment and bewilderment of childlike spirits wasn’t there for me. It just…. wasn’t…. there.

So I decided to stop watching, specifically WWE. I may catch Lucha Underground every once in awhile, when I am home and think about it. But no longer am I going to try and schedule my days or evenings around wrestling. I love it, I always will, and I always have.

MY MESSAGE TO YOU – THE FANS


For those of you that hate WWE and bitch and complain – grow up, watch the product and enjoy it for what it is, or simply change the channel. There’s far too much in this world that is more important than getting your blood pressure going through the roof over a damn scripted show.

For those of you that still love WWE but think it is stale – give it time, folks. Sincerely, I really mean this. WWE, like any other company, goes through transitions. Sometimes they do so too fast and people get lost in the mix. Other times they take so long that we all think we see something that they are missing. Fact is, Vince McMahon rarely misses anything. He may not pull the trigger, whether it is out of spite, ignorance, or just plain incompetence, but he sees it. He sees all of it. You can always bet on that.

For those of you that are still die hard WWE fans and think the current product is the best damn product ever – Stay that way! Keep that feeling and love for as long as you can! Truly, wrestling is, to the fans like myself that love it unabashedly, like your family pet. You never want to see anything bad happen to the family dog or cat, snake, or whatever it is you have. At the same time, you have to remember that wrestling, like your pet, grows older than you do at a faster rate. Therefore, when you think it is stale and stupid just try and remember that it ages faster and therefore it cycles around to the same thing over and over again faster than you’d like.

Think of wrestling as Mercury, and us as Earth. Mercury circles the sun a lot faster than we do. Mercury is also a lot older than we are. 😉

THE GOOD NEWS!!!!!!


So here’s the good news: all is not lost! You have a ton of new (albeit old) faces coming into the scene! It always baffled me that people bitched that they wanted a “new guy” to be “pushed” but everyone are in love with Kevin Owens, Sami Zayn, AJ Styles, and the like. They aren’t “new guys” in this business. They have been around for many years. They are just new to the WWE spotlight. So quickly are the fans to throw a guy like Sandow (who was just released) to the side in favor of an aging AJ Styles. It is just proof that wrestling fans really are just fanboys of the worst kind.

But all is not lost! WWE are transitioning. We had the “golden era” and then the “attitude era” and a “ruthless aggression era” followed by a new “pg era.” Now, the times are changing as we are coming into a Triple H era in mentoring, showcasing, booking, and the like. If you have been watching NXT then you already know that Triple H knows what he is doing. When Vince gave him full control of NXT a little over a year ago, the product shot off into outer space and still hasn’t come back.  The fans love it, the talent love working the shows, and every week it gets better and better.

As Tears for Fears once said: “All around me are familiar faces, worn out places, worn out faces.” That is what the WWE locker room is like right now. Familiar faces, worn out places where they’ve performed, and worn out faces from the endurement they continue to have while entertaining you; the fans.

Wrestling isn’t dying. It is changing. Hell, it is ever changing, even if slowly. So don’t give up on it – but if the day ever comes where you find it is just no longer appealing to you, make sure you stop and ask yourself why. I could very easily say something like “I am tired of wrestling because they got a no talent hack like Reigns as champion and he doesn’t know a wrist watch from a wrist lock!” Sure, I could say that, and while I do believe that he is a shitty wrestler, I also believe the sky is the limit for him if he keeps getting better. But what I know above everything else is that I’m not stopping my watching of wrestling based on a storyline or some other tepid shit. I’m stopping it because the realization hit me that it just isn’t that important to me anymore. Even at $10.00 a month, there just isn’t anything for me in the WWE Network. The PPV’s are no longer appealing, etc….. and that isn’t WWE’s fault. It’s not even my fault. It is just how life is.

I am just happy that I hung around long enough to see Shane McMahon return. I’m also sad that I’m leaving this product before Undertaker, who should have left 10 damn years ago but he, like a lovestruck puppy that married a prostitute, is just holding on for dear life to whatever threads are left.

Maybe I’ll return one day and watch the product. It won’t matter one way or another as I’m certainly not making or breaking WWE’s bank account… (unless you want to count that one time I started the #CancelWWENetwork trend on Twitter…..) Point being, I may return one day, but it won’t be in this role. No longer the writer or participant in wrestling blogs, sites, podcasts, etc…. I have found my role in life and it is where I always knew it would be; with my first love in the arts of the world: MUSIC. And that, my dear friends and fellow wrestle-holics, is what I shall focus on.

So for the last time, and without telling anyone else on the site that this was coming, I bid thee all adieu. Bray Wyatt, one of my favorites, loves to say “We’re Here.” Well folks…. I was once here, but now… “He’s Gone.”

WWE Hall of Fame Update: Tatanka Finally In!

WWE Hall of Fame Update: Tatanka Finally In!

 

I’ve always been a big fan of Tatanka, as I always felt he was never really given the ‘push’ that he deserved. Part of this was simply due to Shawn Michaels being the “hot stuff” in WWF/E at the time, and even Shawn has admitted as much. There was a time when Tatanka was undefeated and was slated to win the Intercontinental title from Michaels, but Michaels refused to drop it to him at WrestleMania. (Yet everyone talks shit about Bret now wanting to drop the title to Michaels… I digress….)

Anyway, for those of you that don’t know it already, Tatanka will be entering the WWE Hall of Fame Class of 2016 this year. Tatanka took to twitter to say thank you and said he can’t wait to see the fans in Dallas, TX, at WrestleMania (which is actually in Arlington, TX, not Dallas, but again, I digress).

His website has also been updated, now saying “2016 WWE Hall of Fame Nominee, Legend Native Tatanka.”

So since everyone’s going nuts over the Godfather getting in (which in my personal opinion just shows you what a joke the Hall of Fame has become, when you put in the Godfather but ignore the Papa Shango side) I am happy that at least one man that deserves to be in the Hall of Fame is finally making it.

Now, if we could just get Martha to stop being a pretentious bitch and let Owen be inducted, I think we’d all be happy.


Editor’s Note: Obviously this didn’t happen.  The rumor is that some behind the scenes political ruckus between Tatanka and Vince stood in the way of it happening, as it was supposed to happen this year and just didn’t.  We stand by the article as we presented it, as even Tatanka believed he was going in, but we all here at W.F.O. believe that he will be soon, and most definitely is among those whom are not in, that undoubtedly deserve to be there.  ~ TxF

As always, you can email us and bitch about why you hate us by sending an email to gofuckyourself@wfounderground.com.

Wrestle Mania 32: The Heel You’ve All Waited For

Wrestle Mania 32: The Heel You’ve All Waited For

 

We are nearing the end of February 2016 and as usual, the rumors are running a-muck about what will go down on the ‘grandest stage of them all.’ Every year about this time we hear two things: Undertaker rumors of retirement and torch passing; John Cena turning heel.

Oddly enough, every year, neither happens. The rumors tend to come from the Meltzer’s of the world, you know, the guys that say “I have it on good authority that this is 100% a 50% chance of happening thing” and then they say “well, I never said it WOULD happen, just that it could.” How guys like Meltzer still have any fucking credibility in the wrestling world is beyond my understanding, suffice to say that somewhere, some evil deity is watching over his ass.

So then, allow me at this time to collectively make you all hate me, love me, and want to string me up and kill me. Why, you ask? Because this year, our very own insider (a former WWE worker that has come through every damn time with the exception of one incident, in which he told us he thought he was being fed bullshit) has decided to toss out some information that he feels is relevant in the realm of both ‘Taker and ‘Cena rumors.

Word on the street is that Cena will be returning after Fast Lane and will challenge the Phenom. This isn’t shocking as it has been known for awhile now that Cena was set to face ‘Taker at this years Mania. It seems even more likely to happen with all the injuries currently on the roster. What did, surprisingly, catch me off-guard was Daniel calling me out of the blue and saying “Check it out, bro. Word from the inside is that we may finally get the heel turn we’ve all wanted for years. A legit Cena heel turn.”

I took it with a grain of salt because as usual, the Cena rumors happen and never come to fruition. Now, I want to lay this out right now: Daniel isn’t saying it is GOING to happen. Unlike Meltzer, Daniel will tell you straight up that it is strictly a strong rumor in the back and that talks have happened between John and Vince on whether pulling the trigger on a heel turn is, in fact, best for business.

So that being said, I got to thinking about a heel turn in the grand scheme of things and I suddenly realized why Cena vs Taker makes so much fucking sense that if the match itself happens, not turning Cena heel would be an epic clusterfuck.

I want you to imagine this scenario. Taker V.S. Cena – Vince’s greatest gimmick in Taker, vs Vince’s greatest homegrown asset in Cena. So imagine a match where it is back and forth, both men battling it out; legend vs legend (and if you don’t think Cena will retire and be a legend, you’re fucking stupid. End of story) and in the end, Taker gets the win. How does it go down, however?

Does Taker hit the tombstone and win the match? Not likely. Not saying he can’t hit the dammed move, but rather that I don’t see Cena going down like that. I can, however, see Taker applying ‘Hell’s Gate’ and Cena fading, and before going limp he holds up his hand in Brock Lesnar style, but instead of a middle finger we get the all important “you can’t see me” wave. The crowd will go nuts because Cena is defiant, and Taker is going to win anyway.

So Taker takes the win, and afterwards, like the past few Mania’s, Taker gets up, see’s his opponent across the ring, and they shake hands. Only this time, instead of that loving embrace we have come to see from the likes of Triple H, Shawn Michael’s, etc, we get what we’ve been waiting for, for over a decade.

John Cena yanks Taker in, hoists him up, gives us the hand gesture while screaming out “YOU CANT SEE ME!!!!” and delivers a hellacious F-U to the dead-man, right in his home state! As Taker hits the ground, Cena wastes no time in rolling him over and applying the STF-U and pulling Taker into contortions that we’ve not thought possible, before slamming his head down into the mat and getting up, triumphant, defiant, and the real leader of the Cenation that we’ve all known was there all along.

To top it off, he leaves the ring, and as he makes his way up the ramp he sees Taker, slowly getting to his feet. So he turns around, rushes the ring, and grabs Taker one more time, throwing him up on his shoulders, holding him for what seems like eternity before shaking his head ‘no,’ telling us that we aren’t getting another F-U, and instead, he pops Taker up and over into the tombstone position and drops the old dog on his head, putting the nail in the coffin of a career that should have ended ten fucking years ago.

That’s right – I said it. Taker’s career has been over for a decade now. The man that was once unstoppable has become the sideshow to Wrestle Mania, and while I LOVE Taker, I am the guy that isn’t afraid to shoot Old Yeller when the damn dog needs to be put down. This scenario would give Taker the win and the retirement he wants while simultaneously making Cena either the most loved heel of all time, or most hated wrestler of all time. Quite frankly it doesn’t really matter which it is because the fans are going to bitch about him no matter what he does.

(And with that, the article is over. Daniel has stated that he firmly believes if Cena faces Taker, we have about a 65 / 35 chance of Cena going heel, as he still thinks that Vince will pull the idea because Vince is a fucking douchebag.) Personally, I give this about a 0.0000000099% chance of happening. Not because I don’t trust Daniel (as I’ve said, the man has come through countless times before) but when even HE says he doesn’t think Vince is going to pull the trigger, well, that tells me that more than likely, this shit ain’t happening.

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Editor’s Note: I’m sure most people were probably digging the scenario till I made my “career that should have ended ten fucking years ago” comment. Here’s the deal: don’t like what I had to say? Good, we have an email address for you to write us at, and that email address is GoFuckYourself@wfounderground.com and yes, it is a legit email address.

WWE – Micromanaging Everywhere: Except Where It Counts

WWE – Micro Managing Everywhere: Except Where It Counts

 

There’s no secret in the world of wrestling that when it comes to World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) they do a shit ton of micromanaging. The main reasons for this should be fairly obvious: they are cramming content into 3 hours of television on Monday Nights, and it is live, and so everything needs to flow at a nice and steady pace.

Now, I don’t want to “rip” WWE and so I almost hate writing this article. Luckily, WWE are only partly at fault in this endeavor and so I will do my fair share of tearing into Cat Daddy Games and 2K Sports as well.

In a world full of micromanagement it sometimes amazes me at the astounding prices that certain things are set at in the WWE world. I’ve seen foam fingers for $20.00, T-Shirts $25.00 & up (when the average cost of a shirt to make and sell is only $8.00, there’s no reason for the shirt to cost $25.00 as $15 to $20 is more than ample) and now, I just realized through the WWE Supercard app that in order to purchase a “superstar card” in the “Legendary to Survivor” area, it will cost you around $50.00 of your cold, hard earned cash.

The reason for this is that a legendary tier card will cost you 4,000 points, and conveniently, you can’t purchase a 2,000 point set, but rather 600, 3,125, 6,500, or 15,000 in points. Notice that HUGE gap between 600 and 3,125? Yea, I noticed that too. What gets me is this: The prices are astronomical! (See picture below)

WWE Supercard Screenshot

So in theory, you could purchase the $24.99 pack plus tax, and then two of the $4.99 packs plus tax, and have enough for a card, but you are actually losing money once you add the multiple taxes into it.  The $24.99 comes out to $27.01 after taxes, and the $4.99 comes out to $5.40 in taxes (I’m in Texas, straight tax of 8.25%) and so you have $27.01 + $10.40 which comes to $37.41. So by time you do all of this, and the hassle of purchasing multiple packs, it is simply easier to pay $49.99 + tax which is $54.11.

But my problem with this isn’t just that the prices are so high. My issue is that WWE, a company run by Vincent Kennedy McMahon, that prides itself on the ability to make money and give the fans something epic, have COMPLETELY missed the mark when it comes to mobile gaming. Fact is, 2k Games and Cat Daddy Games aren’t exactly helping the matter!

If you are saying to yourself right now “but they have to make money and you don’t have to buy the product to win, so just shut up already” I want to tell you to sit down, shut up, and learn something about supply and demand. Any of you here ever heard of a “small” game called Candy Crush Saga™? I am sure that you all have, and unless you’ve been oblivious to Facebook, mobile gaming, etc, you’d know that they started in Sweden in a small office and now have been purchased by Blizzard. Yes, THAT Blizzard.

So how is it that King™, the company behind such a simplistically stupid game became a sensation overnight? It’s even simpler than one may think. They made a simple game that anyone with half a brain can play, and they made sure that it was just hard enough that you may get frustrated and want to buy “power-ups” to help you on your journey. Unlike 2K Games & WWE, however, they took “micromanagement” to a whole new level by adding in what are now famously referred to as “micro transactions.” They weren’t the first to do it, but by God they damn sure perfected it.

King started out with funding, raising 34 million Euros (Roughly 38 million USD) to develop the game. Then, they made it free to play on mobile phones and started making money through advertising. You play a couple of levels, get interrupted, have to watch a 30 second ad, and then go on with your next level. For $1.99 you could purchase the game without any ads and thus never be annoyed by the random stoppage in your quest to make it to the top.

By the end of their first quarter they had netted over $1 million dollars in advertising by ITSELF. Adding in the pay for no ads feature and their numbers bumped up tremendously to just over $4 million dollars. That’s a 300% gain just in people wanting to get rid of ads. So how did they make up the rest of their money? Simple: micro-transactions. For as little as .99¢ you can buy 1 extra move, and the moves, power-ups, etc, increase, including hot sales that they run almost daily. For instance, on Valentines Day, you can purchase 20 gold bars, 2 of every booster, and unlimited lives for 2 hours for a whopping $1.99. Yes folks, a dollar and ninety nine cents.

So many people have become addicted to Candy Crush that their market share has gone through the roof. At last count, they were bringing in between one and three million dollars PER DAY!!!

So how is it that WWE have missed this? The company that loves to micromanage has somehow managed to completely miss an opportunity to net millions from their fans! Looking at King games, and their net worth currently sitting at 86.1 BILLION (yea, with a B), it is hard to imagine that 2k games and WWE didn’t see this.

I’m not suggesting that they drop prices as low as something such as Candy Crush, but there’s no reason why 600 credits couldn’t cost .99¢, 3,125 credits for $1.50, 6,500 credits for $4.99, and 15,000 credits could go for either $9.99 or even $19.99 and still make a hell of a profit!

The only “viable” argument I can see in this arena is that everyone would then be buying mass amounts of cards and would all wind up in the same tier without having to grind. However, I don’t see that as a problem, as your cards are never the exact same level of power as your opponents. How you pro your cards, how you play them, combine them, etc, all has an adverse effect on the total outcome of the sum of numbers. There’s seriously no excuse for not having lower prices on games such as this. The fan base is huge, the game has been downloaded millions of times, and more people will delete the game from being burned out on grinding, than people that will purchase power-ups at this price point. Why not take advantage of this?

Remember around Thanksgiving of 2015, they dropped the price for Legendary cards down to .50¢ per pack, giving everyone a total of 2 packs that could be purchased. I see no reason why they can’t set a weekly number of packs that can be bought, drop the price, rake in the money, and let the fans be happy all at the same time. Wait, actually I do see a reason, and it’s simple: it’s WWE, and they truly don’t understand their own mantra of “best for business.”

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Editor’s Note: I know that coming back out of the shadows, the first article our fans wanted to read was probably not an article based on game numbers and price points, and for that I am sorry. (Not really, but hey, it sounds good.) Fact is, we said we’d be back after the Royal Rumble and well, we haven’t lived up to that return and so I felt as though I had to write an article of some type because if not, shit gets stagnant. So you’re welcome on that end, and you’ll see us around in the near future.

FMR Wrestling’s Old Buzzard – WWE Night Of Champions Predictions

FMR Wrestling’s Old Buzzard – WWE Night Of Champions Predictions

 

This Sunday we get to see what will hopefully be a decent Pay Per View put on by World Wrestling Entertainment. I’ve enjoyed a few of their shows this year but for the most part I’ve noticed that shows tend to be ending sooner than they should, etc. However, you get what you pay for, and well, most of us are only paying $9.99.

Normally here at Wrestling Fanatics Only, we just post our predictions on our Facebook Page and we leave it at that. This Sunday there is a good chance that I won’t be at home to watch the Night of Champions event and so I figured that since I have always thought that predictions should be done on a website (where people are more likely to click a link and read) that I would go ahead and due my inner wrestling fan some justice and bang out my thoughts on a keyboard. So let’s get to it, shall we?

LUCHA DRAGONS & NEVILLE V.S. COSMIC WASTELAND

NOC Lucha

This match should be somewhat boring and yet somewhat entertaining. I am still not sold on the Ascension as they have all but been doomed since hitting the main roster. Sadly, their decline came at the expense of cutting one of the best promos around. Isn’t it amazing that wrestling fans complain that no one “have the nuts to say anything ballsy these days” but when a team does just that, the fans get in an uproar? (Yes, I’m talking about their Legion of Doom promo).

Here’s what I see happening here: Neville has already bested Stardust on more than one occasion, and WWE need to keep their tag teams that aren’t in the title picture on the horizon, ergo, I see this one going on for more than just Night of Champions. I think the heel team need the victory here and they will get it, at the expense of one of the Lucha Dragons. (truthfully, probably Sin Cara because, well, he’s Sin Cara.)

Old Buzzard’s Pick: The Cosmic Wasteland

DOLPH ZIGGLER V.S. RUSEV (W/ SUMMER RAE)

NOC Dolph Rusev

If you haven’t seen the photos from Lana’s wrist surgery, well, you missed some pretty cool looking photo’s. There’s a part of me that says Rusev needs this win and should get the win. Another part of me, however, says that in typical WWE fashion, they’ll try to push the whole awkward threesome love triangle bit by having Summer Rae pull an about face on Rusev. Maybe she does; maybe she doesn’t. I honestly don’t know. What I do know, however, is that if you are going to have Lana stay with the fake Russian accent, she needs to be leading a man to the ring that has a relation to that part of the world, and that is NOT Dolph Ziggler.

I think Ziggler somehow pulls this one off, and soon we see Ziggler either going heel once more (which I think will be a mistake, but it did work with Vickie) and we see Summer Rae turning face quicker than Big Show in the past two months.

Old Buzzard’s Pick: Dolph Ziggler

RYBACK (C) V.S. KEVIN OWENS FOR THE INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP

NOC Ryback Owens

I am honestly not sure about this one. Unlike most people within the WWE Universe, I actually appreciate Ryback. Sure, I hate it every time he picks up a microphone and starts talking, but aside from that I actually like the guy. Further than that I can go as far as to say that I appreciate where he’s been and how he’s had to fight and claw to make to where he is now. 

The problem, however, is that despite Vince McMahon’s misgivings about the man formerly known as Steen; the guy keeps impressing everyone in the company (with exception to Kevin Dunn and Vince McMahon). So for me, this plays out one of two ways:  If Vince is tired of seeing Ryback with the title and notices that the prestige just isn’t there, and he wants someone that can elicit a true emotional response from the crowd, then Kevin Owens wins this one convincingly. If, however, Vince is still refusing to acknowledge just how good Mr. Owens is inside that ring, then Ryback wins this.

With those two thoughts in mind I have to play to the parlor tricks that are professional wrestling and sports entertainment. That is to say this: Unless Cesaro enters a title picture, there’s nothing else for Ryback or Owen’s to do. Ergo, ending this program with Owens taking the title just doesn’t make sense; not when you can play this out a lot longer and get a bigger payoff with Owens really coming out as a huge heel. Therefore:

Old Buzzard’s Pick: Ryback wins via DQ or Countout

                  NEW DAY (C) V.S. DUDLEY BOYZ FOR THE                  WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP

NOC New Day

Everyone and their mother are hoping like hell that the Dudley’s come into Night of Champions and wipe the floor with the New Day, which is exactly why it won’t happen. Like em or not, New Day are hot right now. They took an absolutely shitty gimmick, ran with it, and have found ways to make that gimmick work for them. Xavier Woods trombone is the equivalent of Edge & Christian with a set of kazoos. The difference, however, is that Xavier is more than happy to play his during a live match. Hey, at least it keeps his mouth shut for part of the match.

Taking the tag titles off the New Day would be a bad move. It really would. I know my ECW fans out there (one of the places I post these results will be an ECW page on Facebook) are going to be highly upset with me for picking New Day in this contest. The way I see it, it’s another match in which one of two things happen: Either New Day wins it by cheating, and subsequently they pay the price in the form of a table; or the Dudley’s get a bit ahead of themselves and wind up being disqualified. If the Dudleys walk out of this event with the WWE Tag Team Championship Belts; I’ll be shocked.

Old Buzzard’s Pick: New Day win this shit

SETH ROLLINS (C) V.S. JOHN CENA FOR THE WWE UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP

NOC Rollins Cena

A wise man once said “Always bet on Cena” and that’s exactly what I’m doing in this match. Word coming out of Stamford Connecticut is that John Cena won’t be involved in the WWE World Heavyweight Championship picture until sometime near or after WrestleMania in 2016. If that’s the case, then I think it is only obvious that we are about to start seeing a lot more of those United States Championship Open Challenge contests.

It’s simple mathematics, folks: Seth can’t keep both belts, and he’s more likely to drop this one than he is to drop the big belt.

Old Buzzard’s Pick: John Cena

ROMAN REIGNS, DEAN AMBROSE & UNKNOWN V.S. THE WYATT FAMILY

NOC Wyatts

If the John Cena match was simple mathematics then this match is just common sense. Name one time in WWE history that a “mystery partner” has joined a team in a Pay Per View, and that team subsequently loses. It just isn’t something that happens but once every twenty or thirty years, and it won’t happen here.

I’m a huge Bray Wyatt fan. Always have been, probably always will be. And yet, even I know that the Wyatt’s must lose this match. Remember a time when we quoted CM Punk and made the “gotta make Roman Reigns looks strong” bit? Well, Roman Reigns will look strong in this one, but so will Bray Wyatt and Braun Stowman. Luke Harper, however, will get pinned. I just hope after the match that there is some massive carnage, and maybe, just maybe, we get to finally see Leo Kruger.  For those of you unaware, WWE have already licensed the name change. Adam Rose is no more, and quite frankly it is time for Leo Kruger to come home where he belongs.

Oddly enough, the most intriguing bit to this entire equation is who will be the mystery partner. A picture depicting Baron Corbin showed up and people think it may be him. Honestly, it could be. It could, however, also be a returning Daniel Bryan (which would tear the damn house down and solidify the Wyatt’s), or Kane going face again…. Or maybe…. just maybe… Joe’s Gonna Kill You.

Old Buzzard’s Pick: Shield guys and mystery partner

NIKKI BELLA (C) (W/ TEAM BELLA) V.S. CHARLOTTE FLAIR (W/ PAIGE & BECKY LYNCH) FOR THE WWE DIVAS CHAMPIONSHIP

NOC Divas

This one is where I draw the absolute ire of every true wrestling fan out there. I’m going to be blunt about this one, and you’re not going to like it. Simply put: Nikki Bella retains. Yep, I said it. I know, I know, I know!

You see, all of you out there are thinking that since Nikki now has the longest reign in Divas history, that she’ll drop the title. But she won’t, and you want to know why? Because WWE hit a chord with all the fans (myself included) with that fucked up match on Raw. They hit a chord that cemented Nikki as the most hated damn person on the entire WWE roster, and now, they are going to use that to their advantage. We are all expecting her to drop the title, so the best thing to do if you are WWE is to have her keep it and rub it in our faces just a little bit more.

I fully expect that to happen. I expect WWE to rub it in our faces until we reach an absolute boiling point of blind rage, and then, at that time, they’ll have her drop the title in what will be one of the biggest payoffs in modern history. They are waiting to get the crowd all behind whomever Nikki faces and to be honest the crowd just isn’t at that point yet. There were plenty in the crowd that were happy that Nikki kept the title, and at Night of Champions WWE will try to convince us that we are all wrong by having Nikki actually win a match on her own, without interference.

Old Buzzard’s Pick: Nikki Bella Retains

SETH ROLLINS (C) V.S. STING FOR THE WWE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP

NOC Rollins Sting

Recently Sting did an interview in which he was asked if he’d had any issues with losing to the likes of Triple H, Rollins, etc. His answer was a poignant “not at all.” Basically, Sting said look, my career has come and gone and I am just here to help make some younger guys look good.

He was asked if he expected to be facing Seth Rollins for the championship and he again said no. He said it was on a whim that he was called and asked if he’d do the angle and he said “sure, why not. Tell me what you need.” So in looking at all of that I want to say that my heart of hearts tells me there is no way in hell that Seth Rollins drops the WWE World Heavyweight Championship to Sting.

Then, I look around and I think to myself “where will WWE go with this after this match? If Sting loses, does he just fade away and show up again at WrestleMania to fight yet another losing battle against the Authority?” And it is with that in mind that I am going to say that after Night of Champions, Seth Rollins will not only have lost his United States Championship, but his World Heavyweight Championship as well.

That’s right folks, the old buzzard is calling the clean sweep. Don’t worry, however, as Sheamus doesn’t cash in. I fully expect Triple H to cost Rollins the match. Afterwards, I expect the feud between Rollins and Triple H to take off, leaving Sting to face a man that deserves a title shot in the form of Bray Wyatt. I expect Bray to ultimately win that battle and then drop the title sometime later to Roman Reigns, who will eventually drop it to John Cena for his 16th title reign.

Point being, I expect a lot of shit to happen, and as we all know, you can expect something in one hand, and shit in another, and see which expectation happens first. I won’t be shocked if Rollins wins this, and conventional wisdom says he most definitely will. But from a creative standpoint; my money is on Sting.

Old Buzzard’s Pick: Sting wins

Sting Needs To Win At WWE Night Of Champions

Sting Needs To Win At WWE Night Of Champions

 

Allow me to preface this by saying the following: I am not usually the guy that wants a part timer to win. In fact, I am the guy that has been touting for well over three years now that the Undertaker needs to hang it up and go home. I don’t like part timers, never have, never will.

I feel about the same when it comes to Sting, but I see a potential to elevate the entirety of the next generation of superstars in his match against Seth Rollins. Sting recently did an interview, and in that interview he was asked if he had any issues with losing to guys like Triple H, or Seth Rollins, etc.

Basically, Sting laid it out and said (I’m paraphrasing here) “My time has come and gone, and I’m happy to help boost any young talent that I can.” That’s basically what he said in a nutshell. So why do I think that Sting must win at Night of Champions?

Because, a Sting win opens up a feud that could potentially revive the huge let down that was Bray Wyatt VS Undertaker at WrestleMania 31.

WrestleMania 31 should have been Bray Wyatt’s coming out party. It should have been the moment in time that would be etched in young fans minds for all eternity, such as Ultimate Warrior beating Hulk Hogan will forever be etched in mind. The passing of the torch, the changing of the guard, or whatever the hell you want to call it.

Instead, it was a time when we witnessed Bray Wyatt single handedly carry a feud, with no help from the Undertaker, until the very end when Taker accepted the request for the match. It was a feud laid out with some of the deepest, eerily poetic promos, and what was it followed up with?

It was followed up with Bray Wyatt coming down the aisle at WrestleMania to one of the best damn entrances you could hope for, only to get in the ring and be beat by a guy that honestly had no fucking reason to win the match. Brock Lesnar VS Undertaker is the match that Taker should have won, and Bray Wyatt VS Undertaker is the match that should have ended the streak, but I digress.

So now we enter the final couple of days before WWE’s Night of Champions and on the horizon I see a feud with the Wyatt’s that should come to an end, leaving Bray out to do whatever he wants to do next. I’m not the only one in the world that thinks Bray Wyatt should have a world title. In fact, in a recent WWE poll of superstars that should be given a chance at the title, Bray Wyatt beat out both Ambrose & Reigns. (how the hell that happened, I have no idea, because Ambrose is hella over.)

So I see the potential for Bray Wyatt to get into a truly sinister matchup with a man that knows what sinister is all about. Sting should win his match against Rollins, and without help. He should win the match via a Triple H screw up that leaves Rollins without a world title. Why? Because the Rollins / Triple H angle has to start sometime, and dammit, why not do it now?

Rollins can go after Triple H, and Bray Wyatt can finally have the feud to put him over. He can go at it with Sting and come out on top, only to have Reigns sitting there, waiting for his title opportunity. I think at that point that Bray should beat Reigns at least once with the title on the line, only to have to face him again. The next time, Reigns wins the title, only to have Sheamus cash in and take it from him. For me, this scenario works.

It works because plenty of the fans feel as if Bray is just going to get lost in the midcard section if someone doesn’t do something soon. It works because those same people (and more) generally feel as if Reigns isn’t ready for a title shot. It works because at the end of the day you can have Wyatt come out on top only to fall to Reigns, and thus make the Reigns marks completely happy……for about 30 seconds. It works because Sheamus beating Reigns then sets up what has to be a triple threat matchup, and possibly at WrestleMania 32.

Now, unless WWE have contacted Jake Roberts and cleared him to face Bray Wyatt at WrestleMania in Arlington, TX next year, I don’t know what Bray will possibly be doing for the event. By having him win the title, WWE show that he isn’t forgotten. The fans can have their moment before he drops the title, but in that moment Bray can start a new phase. He can start the “No one but me” phase of his career in which he shows everyone why he is the eater of worlds. Why he is such a sadistic asshole. Why sister Abigail chose him, and most importantly, why everyone, including the doubters, should just Follow The Buzzards.

The Day The Revolution Died (Fuck WWE)

The Day The Revolution Died (Fuck WWE)

 

“Bye Bye Miss American Pie… drove my chevy to the levee but the levee was dry. Them good ole boys were drinking whisky and rye, singing this’ll be the day that I die.”

That’s what it felt like today. I believe I called it last night during the WFO Podcast. I said Charlotte would win it, but probably be screwed, and per the norm, I was right. So here’s my message tonight:

I’m not going to go out and write a long ass article. Instead, let’s just be direct about this.

To Nikki Bella, Brie Bella, and any other fucking Bella: Fuck you. Fuck you for helping to ruin what was once a great division. Fuck you for flaunting it, taunting it, and for sucking whatever dick you had to suck to keep at the top.

To John Cena: Fuck you. I have always supported you, stood behind you, and told people you were a stand up guy. However, upon the information given to me tonight by my former WWE working friend, I have to say fuck you. YOU helped cause this bullshit to happen.

To Stephanie McMahon: Fuck you for not having the guts to stand up to your senile old viagra needing, penis pumping, stupid fucking father.

To Triple H: Fuck you for becoming a corporate sellout and marrying the bosses daughter after you figured out you weren’t good enough to be anything on your own. You succeeded where Macho Man failed, in nailing the bosses daughter. Granted, he tried it when she was 15, so at least you waited for her to grow up.

To Vince McMahon: FUCK YOU!!!! FUCK YOU FOR RUINING THE COMPANY YOUR FATHER STARTED! FUCK YOU FOR KILLING THE TERRITORIES AND COMPLETELY FUCKING UP WRESTLING AS A WHOLE! And you know what? Fuck you for being such a damn pretentious asshole that this entire fucking thing happened because of your fucking greed and inability to let bygones be bygones!

You just couldn’t stand the fact that some asshole named CM Punk walked out on your bitch ass after you almost killed him.  You know the sad part? I fucking hate CM Punk. I have always have, and I always will. He’ll always be nothing more than a half talented piece of loud mouth shit in my eyes. But you know the difference between he and yourself? He showed up and gave the fans a great show. The fans WANTED to see him. Hell, I hated him but I at least appreciated what he brought to the ring.

But NOOOOOOOOO. When he called your bluff and left, you just decided you just had to completely fuck off the only thing that still bore any relation to him. You made his wife drop the title… then you had the balls to fucking ruin his wedding day, for which I hope you live long enough to see one of your granddaughters get left at the fucking alter because KARMA is a BITCH!

You have to systematically ruin everything that was ever good. You practically killed Owen Hart. You definitely pushed Chris Benoit to the point of death. You pushed guys like Guerrero to the limit, and you do it all out of spite. SO FUCK YOU! Fuck everything you stand for. For me, you are by far the definition of a greedy piece of shit.

You have killed what was left of a women’s division (That’s right. I called it women’s instead of DIVAS. You know why? BECAUSE FUCK YOUR DIVAS!) You have buried Natalya while making Paige and Becky jobbers to some other jobbers. You tried to pass off a “Divas Revolution” while having a champ that never defended her title and when she does it always ends in bullshit.

VINCE: YOU ARE EVERYTHING WRONG WITH WRESTLING!!!! IN FACT, YOU ARE EVERYTHING WRONG WITH CORPORATE AMERICA. A GREEDY, STUCK UP, MALICIOUS, MALEFICENT PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT!!!!!

#RIPDivasRevolution

To the Bella Followers: Fuck you. You are part of the problem. No no, you ARE THE FUCKING PROBLEM. Brie Mode? Give me a fucking break. What is Brie Mode? Is that the mode where she gets on her knees for Daniel Bryan? Does he have to yell “yes yes yes” while pretending he likes it?  Fuck your bella army, your bella followers, your corporate boyfriend and your ass kissing husband. FUCK EVERY FUCKING ONE OF YOU!!!!!!!!

Dear WWE Divas: Don’t Blame The Fans Because You Suck

Dear WWE Divas: Don’t Blame The Fans Because You Suck

 

“Feel the power of the darkside, young Anakin!” Or in this case, “Feel the burn of the butthurt, young Diva’s.” I guarantee I get hate mail for this article and honestly, I welcome it with open arms. The best part will be that half the shit I receive in my inbox (or that Josh receives since I am stamping his email on this shit) will be from idiots that don’t bother to read the article.

Dear WWE Divas: Don’t Blame The Fans Because You Suck. That naming of an article is a VERY BOLD statement on my behalf, and one that I am ready to backup any time, anywhere. Why? Because it is the truth. Well, it’s a half truth, really. The truth is that half the diva’s aren’t worth their weight in shit, let alone gold, and the other half of the diva’s don’t know how to go off script and create a compelling match for fear that Vincent Kennedy McMahon Jr. will blow a fucking gasket.

Here’s the deal: Last night after Monday Night Raw went off-air, several “divas” took to Twitter to lash out at the fans and basically call the fans assholes. In fact, Brie Bella actually said “The Brooklyn fans can kiss my ass.” No offense Brie, but no one but Daniel Bryan wants to kiss your ass, and honestly, I’m not even sure that he wants to do that at this point.

The fans are voicing their frustrations with the diva’s division, and rightfully so. Nothing has changed since this “revolution” started. Name one thing that has changed for the better! Just one! What? We now have Charlotte, Becky, and Sasha on the main roster, but what has it accomplished? Not a fucking thing; that’s what it’s accomplished.

We still haven’t had a diva’s title defense in over two months. We still have the Bella’s that not only can’t wrestle, but can’t give a promo, in the ring talking shit and stinking it up like the local landfill, and the worst part? The talented diva’s are having to placate to this bullshit and go right along with it.

Here’s my issue with the “DIVAS” getting angry on social media: Did you notice the Brooklyn crowd didn’t boo Sasha Banks and Bayley at NXT Takeover: Brooklyn? Did you? I have to legitimately ask this because you diva’s are pissed off at the fans when you should be pissed off at your bosses, and even more so, yourselves.

Bayley and Sasha Banks put on a fucking clinic at NXT Takeover: Brooklyn. That crowd was going nuts, I was going nuts, my friends were yelling at their televisions and for once in almost twenty years I can recall myself yelling “THIS IS FUCKING WOMEN’S WRESTLING!!!!!!!!”

Charlotte, Becky, Paige, and Sasha are four of the most talented women to ever set their feet upon the hallowed grounds of the wrestling business. They can get in a ring and they can go with the best of em. So why does it feel like the fans are against these ladies? Simple: Because you aren’t showing us that you can go! On NXT, you showed EVERYONE that you could go. On NXT, you repeatedly tore the house down and made audiences clamour to see you ladies! On NXT, you got people like myself to buy into the shitty ass WWE Network just to WATCH YOU WRESTLE! So what happened!?

The main roster transition is what happened. Since coming to the main roster, you all seem to be out of sync. You don’t flow like you did in NXT. You don’t mesh like you did in NXT. You seem uncharacteristically confused in the ring, unlike in NXT where you moved with the grace of gazelle and the power of a cheetah in-tow. You ladies got to the main roster and we, the fans, got screwed. We expected the world to finally be able to see what we were all clamouring about when you were in NXT. Instead, we’ve gotten the same bullshit that we’ve had the past fifteen years.

Hell, if this is what the main roster transition is like, then you ladies should beg to go back to NXT, where at least you’ll be appreciated, and I don’t mean by the fans. I’m talking about being appreciated by Triple H, William Regal, and the like. Go back to the brand where the young guy gets the final say and Vince McMahon keeps his dirty old perverted hands out of the pot! Go back to the brand where we can see true greatness from you ladies! Right now, you are just another stepping stone in the twisted mind of an old fucker that hates CM Punk and thus wants to ensure that his wife’s run as Diva’s Champ is conquered by a woman that couldn’t wrestle a fucking plastic bag if you spotted her a crippler crossface.

It’s really as simple as that. You’ve all come to the main roster and done virtually nothing. Hell, your debut’s were maimed with hesitation. In fact, up until the point when all three of you ladies put your finishers on the Bella team, nothing was really impressive about the debuts!

If you want the crowd to stop booing you and to stop chanting stuff like “we are awesome” and “this is bullshit,” then give them a reason to stop booing! Stand up to Vince! Hell, beg Triple H and his “breast” for business wife Stephanie to take a stand up to her old ass looney father and let a true revolution begin!

Don’t worry, however, as you aren’t the only people being fucked over by the stupid lunacy of one Vincent McMahon. The Wyatt family were hellacious in NXT and they’ve been nothing but glorified jobbers on the main roster. In fact, Bray Wyatt has just become the equivalent of a schoolyard bully that talks a ton of shit but can’t back it up.

Roman Reigns is hated because people view him as the Samoan John Cena. We want a great heel, not another “never give up” face, and yet Vince refuses to allow the guy to be a heel, which would undoubtedly gain him a MASSIVE following. I can’t stand him as a face, but I’d sure as hell cheer him as a heel.

Point being this:  Don’t Blame The Fans Because You Suck. And when I say you suck, I mean you suck it up on the main roster like a great Dyson Vacuum. We, the fans, know you can wrestle. We, the fans, know you are just what WWE needs to get women’s wrestling back into the spotlight. We, the fans, also know that as long as you keep pandering to what Vince wants, you’ll never bring on a revolution. All you’ll be is just another set of women that “could’ve, should’ve, and would’ve….” but didn’t.

(If you have hate mail… and I am sure you do, go ahead and send it on over to WrestlingFanaticsOnly@live.com)

WWE: They Just DON’T Get It!

WWE: They Just DON’T Get It!

 

We are less than twenty four hours removed from what was supposed to be the “WrestleMania of the summer,” and all I can think about is how it was an epic cluster f**k with all major eyes watching.

For the first time in their storied history, WWE had ESPN on hand at SummerSlam to cover the event not only for radio, but for television. That’s right, folks, Jonathan Coachman and other ESPN personnel were at SummerSlam to cover the event and show it on their flagship ESPN channel where they do Sports Center.

So what did ESPN get to cover? They got to cover a show that wasn’t bad, but damn sure wasn’t great. In fact, ESPN would have been better off covering Saturday’s NXT event. If you are wondering why, don’t worry, I’m going to tell you. NXT put on a clinic this past Saturday night. In fact, they put on one of the greatest women’s matches I have seen in years. So why didn’t Vince take a page from Triple H and put on a great show? Because, he’s Vince McMahon, that’s why.

Let me explain; To wrestling fans, we are used to this bullshit that happens where we see epic matches that end in a complete cluster f**k because WWE have no earthly idea how to write a gawd damned story. But to the person that doesn’t watch wrestling, it comes off as overly cheesy. ESPN is covering this event to draw more eyes to the legitimacy that is wrestling, and WWE decided to take a huge f**king dump on the heads of the collective fans, non fans, casual fans, and even the idiots that still think this is completely real.

Make no mistake about this: things such as UFC would NOT be around if it weren’t for professional wrestling. Point blank, period, end of story. (If Dana White disagrees, he is free to kiss my ass and get on his knees where he belongs. If wrestling is scripted [and it is] then UFC is rigged [and yes, it is] ). Wrestling opened the door for things such as UFC because before wrestling, those things didn’t exist. You couldn’t put that kind of violence on television. Hell, at one point, wrestling was going to be pulled from cable television because it was so violent in the eyes of some viewers.

So WWE bring in ESPN to cover the event, and at the end of the night all I can think to myself is how the average person watching clips of this on Sports Center must think that wrestling fans are complete f**king morons.  Can you imagine not being a wrestling fan, sitting at home watching SC, and they show a clip of what is supposed to be a defining moment in wrestling history where two title belts become unified, and you find out they become unified because of JON F**KING STEWART!?

And if that wasn’t bad enough, just imagine the next clip that shows the “legendary” Undertaker taking on former UFC Champion Brock Lesnar. Imagine that clip for a moment, as a non wrestling fan. You see an old man tapping out faster than a college kid can fap out, only to have some shenanigans happen and the old man wind up winning the match.

For all intents and purposes, WWE had a silver platter that was loaded up with greatness, and all they had to do was put it in the oven and bake it for 4 hours at 300 degrees, and instead, someone had the bright idea to throw the platter in the f**king microwave!

I want to make this perfectly clear: I couldn’t care less that Rollins won the match, or that Taker wound up winning. I don’t care about the outcome. Instead, I care about how the outcome came about, and that is why I have an issue with this. Not only have we not had a Diva’s title defense in over two months (even though we are SUPPOSEDLY having a “revolution), but the title matches keep ending in messed up ways that would anger the most patient man in the world.

I imagine after this event that ESPN probably won’t be back to cover more events in the near future. In fact, I’m quite sure that today Michelle Beadle is taking all kinds of hell from Colin Cowherd as he reminds her of exactly why he thinks only white trash inbred NASCAR loving rednecks watch shit like WWE. Because sadly, I’m starting to think that he has a point, minus the fact that we aren’t all from the South.

Don’t get me wrong, Jon Stewart being at SummerSlam put WWE on every magazine and newspaper headline this morning, but I have to ask this: Did it gain WWE any fans? I would venture to guess that the answer to that is a resounding no. And if that wasn’t bad enough, Jon Stewart will be on Monday Night Raw later tonight to “explain his actions.” Here’s the explanation: “Some f**king idiot wrote an angle that involved a guy that has never been in a ring before and it played out in front of everyone how obviously stupid this shit was.”

In one night WWE managed to de-legitimize Brock Lesnar, make Undertaker look like a pansy bitch, pulled a classic valet trip on John Cena, and helped further cement the belief that no one believes Seth Rollins can win a match without interference.  Seth Rollins has all the talent in the world and yet when they let him showcase it, they always make sure to f**k up the ending to completely make everything he did in the ring for the last 30 minutes seem completely irrelevant.

As if that isn’t enough, Vince continues to push guys that the crowd hates, while completely ignoring everyone in the back that think those guys should go a different route. Take Roman Reigns for example: Reigns has a ton of talent. He doesn’t use it, but it’s there. I call him the “high spot monkey” because WWE have pushed him to only do high spots. I think he has SO MUCH MORE in the tank and could really be the superstar of the future.  All of that being said, Reigns is stagnant. Put him with Ambrose and he still doesn’t get cheered. The fans just don’t like him as a face guy as they see him as being the “Samoan John Cena.”

Everyone that I’ve talked to say they have suggested that Reigns be a heel and that Vince just refuses to allow that. I don’t know why, however, as I think being a heel is what will get him over. We, the fans, are tired of the same ole’ shit with the John Cena schtick, and so a heel is what we not only need, but deserve! My buddy (the former WWE worker) said that even Triple H came out and told Vince that Reigns needs to go heel in order to build a following.

Last night at SummerSlam, Ambrose was cheered like crazy, as were Bray and Harper. Who wasn’t? Roman Reigns. He got the initial women’s pop when his music hit, but after that, it was everyone else in the ring that got cheered. Hell, Reigns even did a Stone Cold beer drinking sign and the crowd gave NO REACTION WHATSOEVER!

Like I said in the title of this: WWE: They Just DON’T Get It!

The Rage Factory on #GiveDivasAChance

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Is The Truth Of The Bellas “Wrestling” Abilities Starting To Hurt Them?

Earlier today we witnessed Emma take to Twitter and essentially issue a challenge to Nikki for her Divas title, if she retains this Sunday at Money In The Bank.

While everyone seemed focused on Emma being taken as a “serious” contender, we at Full Metal Wrestling noticed something else: Nikki mentioning the perception of the Bellas both in and out of WWE.

While this may just be part of the “social media” ploy that WWE and others use in this day and age to push storylines, we cant help but wonder if the Bella Twins are honestly starting to pay attention to all of those “You cant wrestle” chants.

Below is the exchange:


Do you think the Bellas are judged unfairly? Do you think that perhaps the teasing and forthcoming from the WWE Universe will help make them “want it more” and work harder?